Thank God For Revealing the Truth

I am living in sacrifice. I am not just getting by. I am suffering. Every day is a struggle to survive. I stretch every dollar. I rely on prayer and faith for things most people take for granted. I have no luxuries, no cushion, and no backup plan. I do not give up on people unless God makes it clear that I did all I was able and I can leave them in His hands. I do what I can to live honestly, simply, and with integrity before God.

Luke 21:1-4 “As Jesus looked up, he saw the rich putting their gifts into the temple treasury. He also saw a poor widow put in two very small copper coins. ‘Truly I tell you,’ he said, ‘this poor widow has put in more than all the others.’”

Not long ago, I was engaged to a man who claimed to share my faith, even though our beliefs differ. He spoke of God, commitment, and spiritual purpose. He encouraged me to start my GoFundMe campaign. I believed he was sincere. However, he never once shared it with his 1k friends list and followers. Was he embarrassed by my predicament? I believed he loved me with every promise he made. I did not know he would break those promises so easily. There were many signs and red flags I chose to ignore.

Proverbs 27:6 “Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.”

Recently, I saw something he posted. He bought a luxury car. A Chrysler 300C with a V8 engine. He said he wanted something luxurious to drive to conventions and family gatherings. The tone he uses is calm and justified on the surface, but the content is revealing. Saying “this is the last thing I will buy in this system” tries to make it sound spiritually grounded, yet he is clearly indulging in luxury under the guise of practicality and fellowship. Wanting a “luxury car” for conventions—religious gatherings meant to focus on humility and spiritual growth—directly contradicts biblical principles.

I have no first hand knowledge of that model of car other than it is clearly not my style, and I would not want to ride in it based on its looks. It is too bulky looking for my taste., but I am sure many people enjoy the big flashy look!  His words made it clear. It was not about need. It was about appearance. He didn't say anything about safety, reliability, or function—it is clearly about image.  

Within the context of a faith that emphasizes modesty and separation from worldly status, this feels performative—like he wants to be seen as successful or impressive, even in religious settings. That is showing off, whether he admits it or not. Thank You God for continuing to show me this breakup was meant to be.

1 John 2:16 “For everything in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—comes not from the Father but from the world.”

This is a man who claims to follow a faith known for modesty and humility. Conventions are not fashion shows. Assemblies are not for showing off. But he wants to arrive in something impressive. That is not humility. That is pride.

Proverbs 16:5 “The Lord detests all the proud of heart. Be sure of this: They will not go unpunished.”

God showed me this. I did not want to see it. I did not want to believe it. But He made it clear. This man was not who he presented himself to be. I see now that I was spared. God removed someone from my life who says one thing, but lives another. Earlier this year, he purchased a Harley, perhaps another example of wanting to be seen. Good for him for fulfilling a lifelong dream. Yet, he broke promise after promise about a visit because he was not able to afford it. That is the truth I live with in my heart.

2 Timothy 3:5 “Having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with such people.”

I did not lose something precious. I avoided something dangerous. I could have been tied to a life of contradiction, appearances, and empty faith. But God let it fall apart. That was not cruelty. That was protection. It is still difficult to let go, but God wants me to understand that yes, He brought us together, but not to remain together. It was a lesson. I am still suffering. But I am not deceived. I would rather have little and live in truth than have comfort built on hypocrisy. I know who I am. I know who God is. And I know He showed me what I needed to see. And even in heartbreak, that is a gift.

Psalm 34:18 “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”

I began to notice traits in him that reflected narcissism. There was a pattern of self-focus, defensiveness, and a need to control the narrative. When I raised concerns, they were dismissed. When I was in pain, he redirected the conversation. He needed to be admired, not understood. He wanted attention, not accountability.

Proverbs 18:2 “Fools find no pleasure in understanding but delight in airing their own opinions.”

Even then, I stayed. I believed in forgiveness. I believed growth was possible. I was willing to walk beside him if he was willing to grow. I made space for healing. I gave him grace. I gave him love. But growth never came. What I received in return was blame, silence, and emotional distance. The names he called me still echo through my heart. Thank You God for removing this man that was destroying my self confidence instead of building me up.

Romans 12:10 “Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves.”

People that show narcissistic traits thrive on control, performance and appearances. That is exactly what I see in his choices now. The car. The Harley. The public declarations. The image of a spiritual man, while living for praise and approval. The more people "like" his post, the more of a dopamine rush he feels. It is the same pattern. Nothing changed. Only I no longer have to bear the brunt of his choices. I vividly remember one conversation telling him if all he wants is a cheerleader, that is not me. He exploded.

Matthew 23:27-28 “Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You are like whitewashed tombs, which look beautiful on the outside but on the inside are full of the bones of the dead and everything unclean. In the same way, on the outside you appear to people as righteous but on the inside you are full of hypocrisy and wickedness.”

God revealed it while we were together, and I still tried. I loved him through it. I prayed for him. I hoped for change. I hoped he would acknowledge his behaviors. But now I see that love was not enough. Healing begins with repentance. And repentance never came.

James 4:6 “But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: ‘God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.’”

My heart is still hurting. I do not pretend that it is not. I loved deeply, and I let myself believe in something that did not last or even exist. But God has not abandoned me. He has been with me through the silence, the grief, and now the clarity. I do not know what is ahead, but I know I see him more clearly, not blinded by love. That is something I can carry with me, even if my heart is still learning to let go.

Psalm 147:3 “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.”