This is part one in a series about neighbors. For the purpose of this post, "neighbor" or "neighbors" is a person or group living near me, including those on my street, in my neighborhood or community. They may be friends, relatives, or just people that live and work in the community. The focus will be personal anecdotes showcasing kindness, love, and compassion. I will reference bible verses to support my thoughts about neighbors.
Throughout my formative years, it was drilled into me that "people cannot be trusted" and "there is no such thing as a friend—only acquaintances." Although those phrases still echo in my mind, I have never agreed with that line of thinking. While the Bible emphasizes love for neighbors and friends, it also acknowledges the reality of human nature and not everyone acts with integrity.
Micah 7:5
"Do not trust a neighbor; put no confidence in a friend. Even with the woman who lies in your embrace guard the words of your lips."
Jeremiah 9:4
"Beware of your friends; do not trust anyone in your clan. For every one of them is a deceiver, and every friend a slanderer."
Even though I have considerable trust issues, I treat everyone I meet as a friend, including neighbors. If they show me they lack good character or provide some other reason not to trust them, I may distance myself, but I am very forgiving and a bridge can be rebuilt. I'm not sure if my perspective is innate within me, pure rebellion against what I was taught as a child or a lesson I picked up as a young girl attending church.
The following conversation, in part, referenced in the Bible (Luke 10: 25-28) speaks about eternal life and loving your neighbor as yourself:
Law Expert: “Teacher,” he asked, “what must I do to inherit eternal life?”
Jesus: “What is written in the Law?” he replied. “How do you read it?”
Law Expert: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’ and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.'”
Jesus: “You have answered correctly,” Jesus replied. “Do this and you will live.”
This is a philosophy that I can rally behind. I have been fortunate to have lived in some amazing communities and have met some great neighbors in the places where I have lived. It is difficult to form long lasting bonds having moved around quite a bit—seven states, fourteen cities/towns, and twenty addresses—but the common constant is the memories of my neighbors.
Neighbors: Relatively Close
A few of my earliest memories was during my very early childhood close to where I was born, and where my parents grew up and later married. Looking back, I would describe this city as a vibrant urban area just outside a major city, where each distinct neighborhood had a close-knit charm despite its proximity to the hustle and bustle. I recall visiting my maternal and paternal grandparents before we moved away.
Visiting my grandparents' houses as a three or four year old was like stepping into two different worlds. My Italian grandparents’ home was loud and lively, with a table overflowing with a variety of pasta and meats, breads, and salads—where my grandmother would passionately point and shout 'Mangia, mangia!' In contrast, my Polish grandparents’ house was a serene retreat, with a quiet TV humming in the background, where my grandmother gently yet sternly urged us to be quiet, saying, 'I'm watching my story,' as we slid down the carpeted staircase. When we weren't inside, we were outside gathering bags of pears from the huge pear tree in the backyard.
While my memories of visiting my grandparents' houses are few, each visit felt like a grand adventure, filled with excitement and warmth. My grandmothers were strong women, each commanding respect with their authority, whereas my grandfathers had an undeniable strong and stoic presence. Maybe it was during my visits to my grandparents’ homes that I learned the values of hospitality, compassion, resilience and gratitude. These moments have stayed with me and remain cherished in my heart.
Romans 12:13
"Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality."
Neighbors: Petals Around Town
When we moved to a lakeside community, I was just a grade school kid ready to meet new neighbors. It was only about an hour away from where we used to live close to my grandparents. I guess our family growing to seven kids in a short time made it too challenging for my parents to visit them.
Reflecting back, I can almost feel the excitement bubbling inside me when we finally moved in. It was a little while away from the busy city near my grandparents, and everything felt new and different. I remember the streets being quieter, with trees lining the roads, and my bike wheels spinning as I rode around. I’d zoom down the hills, feeling the breeze whip through my hair. The lake—just down the street, down a monstrous hill, and I am there—felt calm, peaceful and free.
The air was filled with fresh smells, and instead of honking cars, I could hear birds chirping and leaves rustling—and the sounds of other children outside playing! It was an adventure to explore the neighborhood, discovering little nooks and crannies. Over the next several years, I would feel like a brave explorer in a wonderful place so close, yet so far, from what I used to know.
Next door to the right lived an older couple that grew rhubarb. Although I can only recall the emotion, I remember enjoying listening to them with wide-eyed curiosity. One day they were gone—I was told an out of state traffic accident claimed their lives. In the house to the left were three boys, the youngest my age with bright orange hair who, like me, played the trombone. I remember feeling sad when I learned they were moving to England.
There was a small diner near my elementary school, close to where I would be hit by a car. I don't know if that accident is connected to why I began going to this diner as a kid alone. Several times, I picked some Morning Glories that adorned the fence line of my school and brought them to a nice lady who ran the diner. It brought so much inner joy to make someone smile. The memory of what she looked like has faded, but the emotion I felt in those moments are still vivid.
Another flower incident occurred with a neighbor which possibly triggered the end to my blossoming flower delivery service. Confidently, I stopped at a neighbor's house on a side street, picked her tulips, rang the doorbell, and proudly stretched out my hand, telling her, "I picked some flowers for you." Her exact words have long been forgotten, but with kindness she let me know I shouldn't have picked her flowers.
There were a few other interactions with neighbors in the community. The one thing they each said as they embraced me was, 'You'll be okay!" Those words can still bring me comfort when I am feeling lost or confused. Though my memories of this lakeside community are few, these encounters with neighbors left an indelible mark on my soul. God whispers, "You'll be okay!" as a daily reminder not to give up.
Colossians 3:12
"Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.
Neighbors: Over Yonder
Just as I was trying to adjust to being a teenager, we moved again, but this time to a new state. My grandparents were aging, and now five hours away; the neighbors from the lake were four hours away. Time and distance takes its toll! On the bright side, each move opens the door to new beginnings and new neighbors! It was a beautiful and serene rural area near a lake. Neighbors were spread out, with some living a half mile down the road, but most much farther away.
I always enjoyed talking to people; learning as much as possible while helping in any way I could. I met the older couple that owned the tavern/inn after I started walking to the lake shortly after moving there. It was a mile through a forest lined, winding, hilly road, but for me it was a passageway to safety. They kept watch over this opinionated teen whenever I would walk to the lake, play pool, or come for the live weekend music. It was exciting when they asked me to play on the softball team they sponsored!
Another neighbor I met lived over three miles away on a small dairy farm. The school bus would drop me off at the intersection in front of the farm. It was a long walk home, so I started talking to the lady at the farm before heading down the road. This wonderfully kind lady always took the time to answer my endless questions and give me tasks whenever I asked how I could help.
In both cases, I wish I had the actual memories, or some photographs. I only have the general emotional connection—I know these neighbors existed, I know I felt safe, I know I am eternally thankful.
As I moved on to my next chapter in life, adulthood, the neighborly stories continued. Every time, I found myself adjusting to new surroundings, meeting neighbors who always seemed to reflect the heart of the place. With each move, from one state to the next, I became more and more detached—to be continued.
Hebrews 13:1-2
"Keep on loving one another as brothers and sisters. Do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by so doing some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it."
Got neighbor stories that could warm a heart or raise an eyebrow?
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