When I took my first train ride, I met a group of college students making a movie on the train platform at my destination. Before it was over, I had learned most of their names before we went our separate ways. It began this way: shortly after arriving, a guy from the group named Brayden approached me and asked if an actor could share the bench with me. As I am really trying to act from my heart and not from my anxiety, I agreed.
I later noticed one of the tattoos Brayden had on his leg really stuck out in a meaningful way. It was the word now inked as N:OW, resembling the time on a digital clock. I found it really profound and timely—so to speak. Since Travis' death, I have thought about getting a tattoo in his memory because he loved tattoos. The first tattoos Travis got appeared to be random letters on his knuckles, but when his knuckles were interlocked, it spelled out "PUNK ROCK," which was meaningful to him as a drummer, but it did not resonate with me. However, the N:OW tattoo really represents many of my thoughts.
People get tattoos for a variety of personal, cultural, and artistic reasons. For some, tattoos serve as a form of self-expression, representing their beliefs, passions, or life experiences. Others choose tattoos to honor loved ones, mark significant life events, or serve as reminders of personal growth and resilience. In many cultures, tattoos have deep traditional or spiritual meanings, symbolizing status, identity, or protection. Some people get tattoos simply for the aesthetic appeal, appreciating the artistry and creativity involved. Regardless of the reason, tattoos often hold deep personal significance and can be a permanent reflection of one’s journey, values, or memories. I do not think the time is N:OW for me to get a tattoo, but I will remember the message.
Oddly enough, on the train ride back, I had mentioned that I hoped to do something before the world took me out or God called me home. My seatmate told me I had plenty of time given my age. That is when I shared my age and rattled off some of the deaths I grieve, listing their relationship to me and their ages. My son, 22. My neighbor, 16. My best girl friends, 62, 52. My best guy friend, 43. My first husband, 53 and his wife 53. Five classmates, 54, 60, 60, 59, 61. I looked at him hoping my point was getting across—no one knows how much time they have left. I feel a sense of urgency when I think of things that are important to me, such as time spent with others. The time really is N:OW.
Conversations like that remind me why people create bucket lists—to make sure they do not leave important things undone. In case you do not know, a "bucket list" is a list of experiences, goals, or achievements that a you want to accomplish in your lifetime. The term comes from the phrase "kick the bucket," meaning things to do before passing away. Bucket lists can include travel destinations, personal milestones, skills to learn, possessions or meaningful activities, such as reconnecting with old friends or making a difference in someone's life. A bucket list can be in writing or just in your memory.
Writing down a bucket list is generally better than keeping it in memory because it helps clarify your goals, keeps you accountable, and allows you to track progress. A written list serves as a reminder, making it easier to prioritize and take action. It can also be revised as your interests change. However, keeping a bucket list in your memory is fine if you prefer a more flexible and spontaneous approach. You may not like the pressure of a formal list and would rather focus on meaningful moments as they come. If you find writing things down helpful for motivation, a physical or digital list may be useful. If you prefer a more open-ended approach, keeping it in your memory is okay too.
Creating a bucket list can be a motivating way to focus on what truly matters to you. It can help you prioritize your dreams and take action toward fulfilling them. You might want to create long, detailed lists, or you may prefer a few meaningful goals. A bucket list can evolve over time as interests change or new opportunities arise. Whether it is skydiving, writing a book, or simply watching a sunset in a special place, a bucket list serves as a reminder to live with intention and make the most of the time available. Ultimately, every aspect of a bucket list depends on what works best for you.
In the end, whether written down or kept in memory, a bucket list is a reminder that time is limited, and the moments that matter should not be postponed. Meeting Brayden and seeing his N:OW tattoo reinforced the importance of acting in the present rather than waiting for the perfect time. Life is unpredictable, and no one knows how much time they have left. There is no perfect moment to start living fully. While I may not be ready for a tattoo, I carry the message with me. The time to cherish connections, pursue dreams, and embrace what truly matters is not someday, but the present—it is N:OW.
James 4:14
"Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes."
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